Celibacy in Today’s cultural context
Contemporary culture influences the perception of celibacy in many different ways. In this first article of a series, we will give a glimpse of some approaches. Although some elements contribute to the fact that this vocation today encounters a certain cultural incomprehension, this is at the same time an opportunity to get more deeply to its roots, both in theoretical understanding-theological and anthropological-as well as in life experience.
Table of contents
- The depersonalization of sex
- Postmodern narcissism
- The project of not having a project
- A generation in need of genuine models
The depersonalization of sex
The second half of the twentieth century witnessed many cultural and anthropological revolutions. One of them radically affected the understanding of the relationship, in man, between passion and love and, ultimately, man’s happiness. Physical drives and sexuality were isolated, so that the vision of man was lost as a whole or in its entirety. The deep motivation for the transcendent good of the person was replaced by the satisfaction of his senses and impulses.
Freud was one of the authors who left a strong imprint in this area. The Viennese psychiatrist proposed that “man is not master of himself, but depends on impulses coming from the unconscious. In particular, human behavior is determined by the libido or sexual instinct. Social institutions put a brake on the full development of the libido, generating neurosis”[1]. According to Freud, “the erotic impulse is sublimated in laws, in morals, in customs, in religion”[2]. From this point of view, celibacy would also be a repressive rule of the libidinal force and, according to psychoanalysis, a complete repression of the person.
Sexual revolution in culture
At the same time, Wilhelm Reich, Austrian psychoanalyst and disciple of Freud, also attempted a synthesis between psychoanalysis and Marxism. He was one of the intellectual promoters of the Sexual Revolution. Held that sexuality is a material and dynamic reality, a function that is part of the development of the person. He maintains that the exercise of sexuality must be free of any inhibition, prohibition or norm. Thus, the family institution itself constitutes a ruling limitation that society imposes on free sexual fulfillment.
According to Reich, renouncing sexual activity is tantamount to mutilating the person. Therefore, celibacy would be a functional mutilation that leads to existential frustration. This way of life would be a source of psychological imbalances, and should be considered a pathogenic factor, assimilable to a neurosis.
Although Reich’s position has already been widely refuted by other currents of the same psychology, it had a remarkable diffusion especially in the 1970s and 1980s and has perpetuated a vision of sexuality that still has some validity today.
The “sexual revolution” was a powerful force that still influences culture today. It pervaded the idea of man, family and human love and consequently, that of celibacy. It would seem that without the exercise of one’s sexuality, it is impossible to live. The tendency to isolate sex is an old temptation of the human race that this cultural revolution has perpetuated.
Postmodern narcissism
Another characteristic of our time is narcissism. It is a pathological emotional relationship with oneself. It is a dysfunction – often becoming a personality disorder – that psychology highlights as a characteristic of our time.
People often ask themselves: Do I really deserve to be loved and admired? This restlessness can become an anxious search for goals and achievements that detract from what truly gives freedom.
There is a healthy narcissism and another that is pathological and destructive. Healthy narcissism can be summarized as the search for an appropriate self-esteem: a realistic, serene judgment that values one’s own qualities fairly. Appropriate self-love is a necessary virtue, an expression of maturity. Upon this self-appreciation depends, the necessary foundation for social and emotional life, the capacity to be flexible and strong when necessary, to know how to enjoy what is good and to live with joy and peace, etc.
Pathological narcissism, on the contrary, leads to an obsessive attachment to one’s own person and emotional state. It leads to selfish withdrawal and makes self-giving difficult. It generates a continuous need for affection, approval, praise and admiration. Its characteristics are possessiveness and the anguish or fear of losing affection.
In short, narcissism is an attitude towards life that makes it difficult to give oneself out of love and, therefore, in celibacy. Once a celibate person defined his vocation by saying that it consisted in shining a little less, so that others shine much more. It is a magnanimous image, full of fruitfulness. Celibacy needs the freedom that healthy self-esteem provides, in order to give oneself freely and thus be fulfilled.
The project of not having a project
In a postmodern culture we find a shift in the understanding of freedom. There is a popular way of understanding it as the possibility to make choices. To be free would be to have no limitations or restrictions to choose what one desires. From this perspective arises the idea that a project which implies a lifelong commitment is contrary to personal freedom. It is therefore understandable that vocational projects and lifelong commitments have been seriously devalued.
When freedom is understood as the possibility of choice, being free means not choosing anything that restricts or prevents me from keeping options open. From this perspective, a paradoxical freedom is pursued, one that is self-restricting. That is to say, in order to preserve freedom, definitive decisions are not made; freedom serves only to be able to choose, here and now, but it does not serve to build a complete project or to do something valuable with one’s own life.
It is clear that freedom of choice is necessary and desirable. But it is important to consider that it is not the only condition of freedom, nor is it the most decisive. Man’s freedom transcends the limit of circumstances because he can live these same conditions without giving up the most important thing in his life: to be happy. It is the window to a deeper and more fundamental freedom: the freedom of commitment.
Identifying freedom with the ability to choose leads one to think that a free life could not be a long-term project, but an instantaneous experience, always new and erratic. Thus, both celibacy and marriage would be life commitments that would limit freedom.
Fragile life choices
Moreover, when life choices are understood in this light, they quickly become fragile. As this idea determines a person’s actions, the vocational experience becomes weak or merely external. Accordingly, one easily falls into a paradoxical circle: one expects to feel in love in order to give a definitive yes, without realizing that, in order to be in love, one must give oneself completely.
It is important to understand that our personal being is designed by God for the infinite, and with His help, the personal journey is possible. God’s plan for us requires the integration of all our dimensions: spirituality, rationality, emotions and senses[3]. And this, for Love! “To promise a love forever” – Pope Francis also teaches -” is possible when we discover a plan that goes beyond our own projects, that sustains us and allows us to give our future totally to the loved one”[4].
A generation in need of genuine models
“Contemporary man listens more willingly to those who bear witness than to those who teach,” said Pope St. Paul VI. And therefore, he concluded, “if they listen to those who teach, it is because they bear witness”[5]. The power and eloquence of genuine witness is a much needed value today. This can be a strong point in revitalizing celibacy.
Those who have received the gift of celibacy and live it with the right attitude show a holy pride in the gift that defines them. They sincerely try to show others a positive, worthwhile way of life which is not outdated and which they seek to share as a pearl of great value. Thus, that natural satisfaction and joy fosters health, initiative and perseverance[6].
It is a challenge and a great opportunity for total surrender to the Kingdom of Heaven. Today young people are less conditioned by political correctness when the cause that summons them is lived and incarnated by witnesses who carry them along, because they live it with conviction and passion. As in the time of the first Christians, the conditions are now ripe for many to open up and discover the generous value of celibacy through the burning witness of those who live it today, even in the midst of a difficult world that so often rejects God. The illusion and conviction conveyed by the lives of these witnesses overcomes any adverse sociological data, allowing the luminous truth of the vocational adventure to shine forth.
Fernando Cassol
Notes to the article Celibacy in the Cultural Context
[1] Fazio, M., Historia de las ideas contemporáneas, Rialp, Madrid (2007), 331-332.
[2] Fazio, M., Historia de las ideas, Rialp, Madrid (2007), 333.
[3] Cf. Vial, W., Psicología y celibato, en Caballero, Juan Luis (Ed.), El celibato cristiano. Una vida plena y fecunda. Palabra (Madrid), 2019, 180.
[4] Pope Francis, Encyclical Lumen fidei, n. 52.
[5] S. Paul VI, Apostolic Exhortation Evangelii nuntiandi, December 8, 1975, n. 41.
[6] Cf. Vial, W., Psicología y celibato, in Caballero, Juan Luis (Ed.), El celibato cristiano. Palabra (Madrid), 2019, 185.
